Ours

In the past, I've had some mixed feelings about Taylor Swift.  I have lots of positive things to say: she's a great song writer and she's (so far) a positive role model.  I'm thrilled to have such a major, young star staying out of trouble and seemingly making good choices.  Just hoping she doesn't let me down...

On the other hand, I have had some serious questions regarding her ability to sing on pitch during live performances.  She gets the most improved award in that area because lately she sounds WAY better.  She either got some excellent voice lessons or a really, really good auto-tune microphone.  I also have a smallish issue with her winning all the big time awards over some of my other country boys that I think deserve it.  But that's another story for another day!

She does have some pretty nifty songs, and I especially like her song "Ours".  It's a catchy tune, and that's all well and good, but it actually made me stop and think.  When I first heard the chorus, I said, "Well now, ain't that the truth". (I think I actually even said it out loud.)

Here it is:

So don't you worry your pretty little mind
People throw rocks at things that shine
And life makes love work hard
The stakes are high, the water's rough, but this love is ours

Originally, it was that third line that got me.  Life makes love work hard.  Maybe I'm just waist high in some deep thinking, but it's true.  It just is.  Life is hard.  But love is worth working for even when it's not easy.  

So I thought about that line for a while, especially when I heard the song on the radio.

Then one day, Parker and Claire heard it too and asked what the second line meant.  We had a good discussion about jealousy and how people sometimes act.  That was a few months ago.

After Parker's Stinkbug program at school, he mentioned that another little boy said some ugly stuff to him the night of the program.  That other little boy just happened to be one of the others who was really wanting the role of Stinkbug.  I'm really not sure the boy even meant the comments because it sounded kind of like a joke, but Parker took it seriously.  As we were talking about it, he said, "You know what, Mommy? He threw rocks at things that shine".  He wasn't saying it in a bragging way at all, just realizing that it was probably rooted in jealousy.  I thought it was kind of funny how that way back discussion stuck with him.  I just hope when the tables are turned, Parker and Claire choose to encourage and not tear down.  I need that lesson myself too.  Jealousy can be such an ugly thing whether you're six or thirty-six.

Grace for the Good Girl

Ok, here goes...

I finished reading Grace for the Good Girl by Emily P. Freeman sometime last week.  Truth is, I'm still processing it, and I think I will be for a long time.  I don't know if I've ever connected more with a book than I did with this one.

Here's the Amazon description if you're interested:

Many of us believe that we are saved by grace--but for too many, that's the last time grace defines our life. Instead of clinging to grace, we strive for good and believe that the Christian life means hard work and a sweet disposition. As good girls, we focus on the things we can handle, our disciplined lives, and our unshakable good moods. When we fail to measure up to our own impossible standards, we hide behind our good girl masks, determined to keep our weakness a secret.

In Grace for the Good Girl, Emily Freeman invites women to let go of the try-hard life and realize that in Christ we are free to receive from him rather than constantly try to achieve for him. With an open hand and a whimsical style, Emily uncovers the truth about the hiding, encouraging women to move from hiding behind girl-made masks and do-good performances to a life hidden with Christ in God.

I already feel like God has taught me so much in the past several years about topics that the author discusses in the book, but I just couldn't get over how much I related to her.  My high-lighter got a work out that's for sure.  Claire even asked me why I was writing all in my book! At times, I almost stopped high-lighting all together because it seemed like a waste of time when it was almost every word.  

So here's the thing...I'm a good girl.  At least I try to be.  That's always been the goal.  I was a "good" child, a "good" teenager, and so forth.  Chances are, lots of you all are too.  I never had a big rebellion.  I was saved at a young age and raised in church by wonderful Christian parents.  I was WAY too responsible to risk my reputation, hurting my parents, or disappointing Jesus.  Kind of like a mother hen, I kept all of my friends in line.  At least I tried to, and I felt responsible if they didn't "follow the rules".  Yep, that's me.  Pretty much a big ol' goody two shoes.  Now don't get me wrong, I'm far from perfect.  I've made more than my share of mistakes.  Way more.  It's just that I'm one of those girls with a really boring testimony.  At least that's how I've always felt.  I'm so thankful for my boring testimony, but along with that comes my "good girlness".  

I've rambled long enough, but I must share some of these quotes from the book with you.

"My idea of who I should be is at war with who I am.  I want to be perfect in every situation. I just do. I want to know what to do. I want to know how to do it right."

"Because I care so much what you think, my hiding has everything to do with you. I desperately want to manage your opinion of me."

Preach, sister, preach. 

"Still, I like knowing the rules.  If the sign says Don't Tough, I don't touch. If it says Keep Out, I stay away.  If the form is due on Friday, I'll turn it in on Thursday just in case.  If the doctor says take one in the morning and one at night, I am sure to space them out exactly twelve hours. And even though I admit to occasionally bringing candy into the movie theater, I am always worried that the ticket person will search my bags and throw me out for smuggling in a bottle of water and two Peppermint Patties". 

"It is the false belief that I, myself, am the cause or explanation for the bad, uncomfortable, or dissatisfied people or circumstances around me.  Likewise, it also means that I feel the need to prevent the bad, uncomfortable, or dissatisfactory circumstances from happening in the first place.  I can't remember a time when I didn't feel responsible. I was responsible to be right. I was responsible to look good. I was responsible to have it all together. I was responsible for being responsible."

I'm going to stop quoting now because this post is way too long.  Also, I REALLY want you good girls out there to read the book.  I could write so much more.  SO MUCH MORE.  I want to, and I'm holding back because you need to read it for yourself and see if any of her words resonate with you.  Obviously, the book goes into ways to overcome the fear and anxiety that accompanies being a good girl.  And in the end, it's all about Jesus of course.  

I know I encourage you to read books fairly often, but this time I really mean it with my whole heart.  Especially if you are a good girl.  

(If you read it, please let me know.  I'd love to discuss more of the book with a fellow recovering good girl.)

My Day

So I just posted about Parker's fun program at school tonight on the other blog.  He did such a wonderful job in the role of Stinkbug.  Now I'm sitting here on my "letting it all hang out" blog reflecting on this day.

1.  I had my last evaluation for this school year today.  Everything went really well, so I'm not complaining.  Just admitting the fact that I am tired from the anticipation and carry through.  So thankful it's over, and I can feel good about it.  But tired.  So very tired.

2. An afternoon of homework, dinner and clean-up, fancying up a stinkbug, and racing back to school.

3. An evening of cheering on a stinkbug from the audience, taking pictures, and feeling proud.

4. Home, bedtime, preparing stuff for tomorrow, etc.

5. Hearing a cry, rushing in and finding a child covered (and I mean covered) in vomit.  Cleaning up a bed (with help from the most wonderful husband and daddy in the world), changing sheets, starting the washing machine, helping with an unplanned shower, and tucking in for a second time tonight.  Predicting that it could be a long night.

6. Feeling thankful that I get to be here for every single part of it.  And I wouldn't change a thing.  Except maybe the vomit.

(I really don't like that word.  The "v" word.  I just don't like any of the alternatives either.)

7. Praying.

Just Catching Up

Claire and I went shopping. As soon as we walked into TJ Maxx, she begged to go try on shoes.  I guess I'm not the only one who walks around like a newborn baby animal in heels.  The difference is: people think she's cute doing it, but I look like crazy.

Like Mother Like Daughter

A little girl in my class brought me this sweet note.  It says:

"I love you. You are a great friend to me.  I gave you an apple for all the work you do for us."

So sweet! It's the little things like this that make my day!

(That's an apple in that wadded up paper towel)

I found this shirt and decided I must have it.

But if I get it, I'll have to get Brian this one.  We pretty much have a Pepsi/Coke battle going on all the time.

P.S. I accidentally called Pizza Hut in Gray when I was trying to call my mom.  Do you think I should take it as some kind of sign???

Because I'm Still Processing

Today was interesting to say the least.  (Chances are, you won't care about this at all).

A couple of days before spring break, I was asked if it would be ok for some school board members to visit my classroom on April 17.  Sure.  I didn't even hesitate.  I was under the impression that a few people might walk through my room as they also visited every other class in the building. 

Today is April 17.  In case you didn't know.  This morning, I was handed a schedule that had four teachers' names on it. I was one of four.  In the whole building.  "Here's the schedule for the visit today.  There will be two groups.  Included in these groups are the Superintendent of Schools, THREE Assistant Superintendents and ALL of the school board members.  Oh, and you're first on the list.  They'll probably stay for a while to watch and talk to the kids and ask you questions. Have fun!" Excuse me? I did not sign up for this.  I guess I should feel good that my class was chosen for the visit, but my stress level went up about 52 notches.  I found myself in a way-bigger-deal situation that I had anticipated. 

As promised, I had two groups of VIPs visit my classroom today.  It was fine. The kids were well behaved.  The activities went as planned.  I didn't have a full blown panic attack (just a mini one).  Everybody seemed happy, and it was actually a quite pleasant experience.  I call that success.

So what is the take away? What should I learn from all of this?

In the words of Steve Winwood:

You just roll with it, baby
Come on and just roll with it, baby
You and me, roll with it, baby
Hang on and just roll with it, baby

(Now that song is stuck in my head)

Tales From The Nursing Home

Today was my first day back to school after Spring Break.  And it wasn't pretty.  At all. 

I got to bed last night a little late because I have some wild friends who shall only be referred to as MLBSG or S, L, & R.  Being the Mamaw that I am, 11:00 was certainly past my school night bedtime.  We had so much fun though, and it was totally worth it.

Unfortunately, I didn't sleep great and definitely have some sinus issues starting.  So I felt kinda puny-ish.  Also, I made a remarkable discovery today.  Apparently, ten days out of school is the exact amount of time it takes for first graders to forget every rule and procedure they ever knew. 

I had really great intentions of walking tonight, but I just went and talked myself right out of it.  I blamed it on my tiring, puny-ish day.  Then I decided that I definitely should stay in and rest up for my big night of television.  It's hard on a Mamaw to watch Dancing With The Stars and The Voice all in one night. 

Well, I reckon I better skedaddle since I'm no spring chicken, and I'm plum tuckered out.  I guess I'll just piddle the night away watchin' my stories. 

Goodnight. Sleep tight. Mamaw loves you.

I Always Keep My Promises

So I'm about to hit you with some riveting photos.

Last night, Parker and Claire spent the night with Nana, so Brian and I went to Chop House.  Brian LOVES Chop House with all of his heart.  We usually go about once a year for his birthday, so this non-birthday trip was extra special.  I like it, but I don't love it (kind of like dark chocolate).

So the first picture that I give you is this:

My salad

Picture number two:

My steak and baked potato

 Now before you get too excited, I should just tell you that it wasn't as good as it looks.  See that potato up there? It was (three words) Fab.U.Lous.  BUT:

My steak was a little weird.  It had a whacked out texture or something.  I didn't say a word though because I didn't want to ruin Brian's ultimate Chop House experience that he had going on.  Then all of a sudden he said, "This steak is a little different tonight.  The texture is strange and the flavor is a little off".

Yes! I knew it!

So he says they get one more chance, and if it's not-so-great again, then it's over.  He's already planning a break up.  Even though I just moderately like the place, I actually feel a little nervous for Chop House.  

Because we are party animals, we went to Barnes and Noble after dinner. 

Here is Brian's dessert: 

Two forks...but I didn't take a single bite

 This was my dessert:

Yummy!

That's all I have for you today.  Except that I accidentally squirted my "only thing that keeps me from being totally bald" conditioner onto my body loofah thingee.  So I'm afraid that the hair on my arms will suddenly grow in think and full.  Wonder if it would work on eyebrows?

Hold On To Your Socks

Because I'm about to rock your socks off with some exciting pictures.

Yesterday, we had another fun Spring Break day of doing not much at all other than running around here and there all day.  Brian and I had to meet with our accountant in the morning, then the kids and I shopped a little.  They were extra thrilled to try on clothes and shoes at several stores as you can imagine.  I may have encouraged them to stay the course by the promise of an Icee at Target.  I'm not above a good old-fashioned bribe.  Plus, it is spring break after all. 

Things took a dramatic turn for the worse when the Icee machine had a sign that said "Closed for Repair".  Words of Doom.

With the promise of a Sonic half-price slushy sometime between the afternoon hours of 2:00 and 4:00, we headed off to eat a nutritious lunch at Arby's. 

I present to you the first exciting picture of the day:

See I told you it was going to make your life complete.

After lunch, we had some time to kill before Happy Hour began.  For the sake of saving $1.19, I refused to go before 2:00 and pay full price.  Being frugal is probably one of my best strengths.  I bet Brian would totally agree with that last statement.  Ahem.

So we stopped by Mom's house to visit a bit.  Then Megan came by.  Then Mike.  There was a lot of talking.  Two and a half hours later, I screeched into Sonic on a wing and a prayer just in time to make the 4:00 Happy Hour cut-off.  And drinks were served.  Unfortunately, I didn't get a picture.

Then last night, I got to spend some time with Lisa eating, driving, and shopping.  We pretty much solved all the problems of the world (as usual).

But here is the only picture I took:

I really have no explanation for why I took this picture.  Yes, it's a picture of my foot.  Maybe I wanted to document that I actually can still half way stand up in heels even though I never wear them anymore.  Or maybe I just wanted to see what it looked like on my giant foot.  Or maybe I just wanted to look like the crazy lady who takes pictures of her own foot in the middle of T J Maxx.

I did discover that I truly can't walk in heels anymore.  I eventually put the other shoe on too and tried to walk around.  If they had people watching the store through security cameras at that moment, somebody got a real laugh.  "Hey, look at crazy lady taking pictures of her foot and walking around like a newborn calf."

In other news, I found myself defending my OVER THE COUNTER Sleep Aid that is currently my drug of choice on more than one occasion yesterday.  So apparently I felt the need to take a picture of my brand new box when I got home last night.  Somehow, I rationalize that it is safer than Nyquil (my one true love) because there is no pain medication or allergy medication or ingredients that contain alcohol.  And I only take one.  That's half a dose.  It's totally non habit forming.  See it says it right there on the box (in this last exciting picture from the day):

You can go ahead and put your socks back on for now, but just so you know...today promises some excitement too, so I'll be back soon with more pictures.  The fun never stops around here.

52 Things Kids Need From A Mom

I recently read 52 Things Kids Need From A Mom by Angela Thomas.  I've enjoyed her speaking and writing for some time, so I thought her new book would also be good.  It is written in short, easy to read chapters, so it was handy to just pick up when I had half a minute here and there.  Overall, there really wasn't very much new information, but I still enjoyed the reminders.  I think you would like it too!

I Won't Quit My Day Job Just Yet

My Dove dark chocolate tonight said the following:

"Be the first to hit the dance floor."

I have a feeling those chocolatiers haven't ever seen me in Zumba.

I've been thinking of some other inspirational sayings I'd like to find in my dark chocolate wrappers.  Here they are in no particular order:

1. Drink more Pepsi.
2. You look super hot in your minivan.
3. Have you lost weight?
4. Your hair looks fabulous ~ it's definitely not thin and flat.
5. Spend more time on Pinterest.
6. Stop wasting time cleaning, hire a maid.
7. Nyquil addiction is healthy and normal.
8. Watching House Hunters makes you smarter.
9. You are totally rockin' that half eyebrow.
10. Italian Village pizza lowers cholesterol and blood pressure.  Oh, and it's fat free too!

I think I might just have a second career on my hands writing for Dove.  If fact Dove, have your people call my people. 

So what would you like to read on your wrapper?

I May Have Mislead You A Little

My hair really isn't dark brown at all.  In fact, NOBODY has even noticed the change except the people I told to please notice it.  So, everybody just calm down for cryin' out loud. 

I finally updated the other blog, but let me assure you that Phoebe continues to be difficult.  I think she knows her days are numbered around here anyway.  I had to email all of the pictures individually to myself then download and save them all.  Ridiculous. 

Last night, I made lasagna.

Enough said.

(Two days until Spring Break!)